2012 Highlight

2012 for me is a really simple and also really different year. I know it sounds wired, but when I explain why I said that, I think a lot of people will have the same feeling with me.

In my 2012, I learned how to speak. What is that mean? I came to the U.S. on July 2011. When I arrived here, I felt very uncomfortable. Everything for me was new and strange. I was hardly open my mouth and said any word even I liked speak very much. I thought my personality was totally changed. I just liked someone else. It's not me, sometimes when I looked myself I even can not recognize myself.

That was a hard time. I couldn't going out by myself because I am afraid getting lost, I couldn't buy anything by myself because I didn't know how to explain the thing which I wanted, I couldn't walk my dogs alone because I was afraid someone talked to me when I on the road. I felt very shame when people talking to me and I couldn't understand. In that time, I couldn't leave my husband even one minute. We argued a lot in that time because I need him all the time but he need spent time in his work. I was really sad in that time, sometimes I thought I couldn't stay in the U.S and I wanted to go back to China. I miss my family, my friends, foods etc.

Things changed in 2012. I don't know when was the starting point. I have begun to speak. I didn't feel shame when I talked to someone but he didn't understand me. I explained many times until he got my meaning. It's a huge change in my life. After that, I have begun to fix my life in the U.S., and I have started work study in CCSF. After that, I have never feared talking to anymore. I found myself back.

I know this is mean nothing for many people but it's really important to me in my whole life. I believe there still have a lot of people like me can feel this. When I look this back after 5 or 10 years, I will still feel cheerful and I will say this story to my friends and my children when they feel disappointed. This is my highlight in my 2012 and it is also a highlight in my whole life.